When it comes to living our lives, we surround ourselves with the trivial things for so long that we begin to lose ourselves and our true purpose in this world. Human beings get caught-up in the need and desire to earn more money, buy more things, rub elbows with all the right people to help us earn more, so we can buy new things – and the circle never ends. This simply becomes life and at some point, normally at about the age of 40, we suddenly look around one day and wonder what the hell happened.
What happened to the childhood wonder? Where did the passion go and why do we feel so little on the inside except empty? Where is my joy and why do I feel cheated? We find ourselves mourning for the child we used to be and the dreams that never became reality.
What dreams have you let go of or simply forgotten because life beat you down, wore you out and pushed you into an alternate reality? I’m reminded of an old joke that my anthropology professor used to tell about playing dirty jokes on chimps. Wanna see something funny? Give a chimp an onion and watch them peel and peel until nothing’s left. Sometimes I feel like that chimp…how much can be peeled away until there’s nothing left?
It’s exhausting. I see your pain. I feel your pain. I express it for all of us. I’m a writer.
I do my best to install a zipper to my very soul and give you access to the zipper. As a human being, I strip myself down to the bone day after day. Every word I write is a little piece of me. Every pain has a root in reality.
I have nothing else to offer you but my pain and the beautiful reality of my suffering. This is a human condition. This is human. This is me. Pain can be beautiful. Pain can be addictive. Pain can be just what saves us, wakes us and moves us. I am pain … let me move you. Let me wash over you and bathe you in my emotion.
“Let me see you stripped down to the bone…let me hear you screaming just for me.”